The decrease in socialization among older and aging men can be attributed to various complex factors. One significant factor is the evolving responsibilities that come with age, such as career demands, family obligations, and caregiving responsibilities. Additionally, physical health issues and mobility challenges that may arise with aging can limit opportunities for engagement in social activities. As men progress into their middle age and beyond, these commitments and health concerns can take up a substantial amount of their time and energy, often leaving them less time for social interactions.
Doesn’t Need Extra Socialization
One poster commented, “I work a lot with people all day, which I really enjoy, but I have to unwind at the end of the day/weekend. I do my socializing at work. I don’t need extra socialization other than that.”
A second user shared, “I’m severely introverted. The Pandemic destroyed what little of a social life I had as I’m high risk. The world has changed for me. It takes me longer to recharge after going out. It’s hard for me to make friends as an older man. My interests (gaming, video games, food) gave me the “old man” of the group as age slows me down.”
Socializing Is Draining
A third user posted, “Socializing really drains the life out of me, and I need to retreat for longer and longer periods. It feels like a chore to make plans, go out, and spend money. I’m just over it now.”
Already Lived That Social Life
A top-liked comment said, “When I was in high school and college, I was out non-stop. There literally wasn’t a party or bar I wasn’t at. I remained that way into my late 20’s. I’m just over 40 with two young kids, a wife, and many responsibilities. I just don’t have time for other people. If I never go out again, I’m good. I lived that life for many decades.”
Time To Recharge
One person commented, “I have so much less time to myself and very little time to relax and recoup than I’ve ever had in my life. If it’s a Friday evening and I have a chance to relax to myself with some popcorn and a movie vs. going out to see my good friends? I’m sorry, I love my friends, but I really need that time whenever or however I can get it.”
This user recalled, “Im 33, and because of some… let’s call them health issues, I shut myself in for a long time. I recently started going out a lot again with friends, and yeah, it is exhausting. I just want to sit with a couple of buddies, play some board games and drink some beers.”
Would Rather Do What Makes Me Happy
A poster stated, “I feel like as I get older, time passes a little faster, and I don’t want to waste time doing stuff I don’t want to do. I’d rather spend my days doing what I want. Makes me happy.”
Tired & Broke
One user mentioned, “ I work 10 to 13 hours most days. Then still have to fix all the broken or worn-out stuff around the house and cars. Going out usually costs me more money, which I’m struggling to make enough of because I don’t get any overtime or compensation for my extra work. My wife and I are paying for multiple college educations. I’m just tired and broke AF.”
Being Alone Is Rare
A commenter divulged, “I was always a bit of a loner, I was social in my younger years, but now I’m in my mid-forties, and my favorite times are when I’m alone. I love being alone and alone time is rare with 3 kids, a wife, and a full-time job. So if going out means I give up my alone time, I’ll 100% choose to hang with myself every time.”
The Snacks Are At Home
This user shared, “I’m 25 and don’t want to go out with people, rather just stay home with my cat and play Xbox with my friends. Way less effort, more comfortable, and there are always snacks around in case I get hungry.”
One poster lamented, “I have no friends, and I don’t seem to be making new ones either. It’s fine, though. I understand why older guys have maybe one or two friends max.”
A top-liked comment said, “Once I quit drinking, there was absolutely no reason to go out anymore. Giving up alcohol feels like I got a new second life, and I want to enjoy it. My life is great now. I’m married with children and a great job. I can finish projects around the house instead of leaving them 90% complete. When I was going out constantly, I never got anything done.”
Not My Friends
A person stated, “All of “my friends” are, in actuality, my wife’s friends’ husbands. I don’t have long connections with them, and most are not the type of guy I want to hang out with. I talk to my friends often because we online game and we’re all in different locations. Online gaming with my friends is more than enough socializing for me.”
Just Want Peace & Quiet
One user mentioned, “I work full time, then deal with kids after work. I get about an hour each day of time to myself. Any other free time I have, I just don’t want to be around anyone else…. just want some peace and quiet.”
Would Rather Hang With My Dog
A poster commented, “I’m 47, and my kids are almost grown. I’ve spent most of the last 25 years doing nothing but working, providing, and volunteering for sports and organizations that my kids were involved in. I spent a lot of time when I was younger trying to have a social life on top of everything else. Now, I couldn’t give two sh*ts about socializing and am perfectly happy being at home puttering, hanging out with my dog, or just doing nothing. My wife still enjoys socializing with friends and going out, but I prefer my dog’s company over hanging out with friends.”
Quality Matters More Than Quantity
Finally, this person shared, “I see most social events as fake pleasantries with people I’ll never see again. Put me in a bar with 30 unknown people, and I’m quiet as a mouse but put me in my backyard with a good friend, and you can’t shut me up. The quality of relationships matters more than quantity. Source: Reddit
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