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Hard Truths: 18 Tough Realities Couples Have To Face Sometimes

Building and keeping a strong relationship takes honesty, communication, and compatibility. Making it work encompasses just a small part of creating a successful relationship but, when a relationship breaks, there are lessons you can learn from it.

A poster asked the question, “What is a brutal truth about relationships?” and people from all over the world added in their lessons and takes about what their learned “brutal truths” from past relationships are.

Love Isn’t Enough

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One Redditor said, “Love won’t save deep insecurities or incompatibility.”

A second Redditor added, “Love is not enough.”

A third Redditor said, “Most people stay in bad relationships or with incompatible people because they think love is enough. It’s not.”

Making Mistakes

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Another user said, “You can both do nothing wrong, and it can still end in a disaster.”

This user added, “It is possible to commit no mistakes and still lose. That is not a weakness. That is life.”

A Redditor said, “Conversely, just because a relationship ends doesn’t mean it wasn’t successful. Some things just run their course.”

Pulling Your Weight

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This Redditor said, “No matter how hard you work to save it/fix it/change it if the other person doesn’t do anything, you must walk away. You have to accept who the person is, not who they could be.’

Another Redditor said, “There’s no such thing as a 50/50 relationship. Sometimes it’s 55/45, sometimes it’s 90/10, sometimes it’s 60/40. Very rarely is it 50/50, and even on those rare occasions, it’s not sustainable.”

Highs & Lows

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One user commented, “A healthy, stable, committed relationship can sometimes feel ” boring ” if you’re used to the highs and lows of a toxic relationship.”

A Quick Fix

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A user quickly added, “They don’t fix people.”


Don’t Say “Calm Down!”: upset couple talking on a couch man looking away
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A Redditor said, “No matter how compatible you may think you are in every way, relationships aren’t perfect or easy. Effort needs to be put in by both partners.”

Outside Relationships

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This user said, “There is more to life than just romantic relationships. Other relationship types are equally important to have, work on, and maintain.”


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A Redditor added, “They’ll trigger every childhood wound you have.”

A user also said, “If they harm your mental health, they aren’t worth it.”

Self Love

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This Redditor said, “They are not a necessity. It will not kill you to be single.”

A user commented, “They won’t fix your insecurities.”

They End

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This user added, “One of you will have to watch the other die one day.”

A Redditor had this to say, “Every relationship is going to end eventually and in one of two ways. Either by a breakup or someone dies first.”

Building Takes Time

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One Redditor said, “You’ll hurt each other and learn from that to strengthen the relationship.”

A second Redditor said, “There are days when the love is strong and others when the love is very weak.”


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This Redditor said, “If you can’t communicate effectively, it is doomed.’

Another commented, “You can’t have a healthy relationship without respect, compassion, communication, and compromise.”


Woman holding her head
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One user added, “You also have to work on yourself and your own issues before you are capable of being in a healthy relationship.”

A second user added, “It’s better to be single than in an unhealthy relationship.”

A third user said, “If you don’t like yourself, loving another person will not fix that.”

The Truth

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A Redditor had this to say, “⁠Your partner won’t always be there for you.”

One commenter said, “⁠No matter how much you love someone, it’s dangerous and foolish to trust them 100%.”

This user said, “Every person has some sort of bull****.”

A user also added, “There’s always one person that cares more, but the person that cares less has all of the power.”

Knowing When To Quit

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A user candidly commented, “⁠There will be times when you have to save yourself.”

A Redditor commented, “⁠Your partner may openly disagree or misunderstand how you self-identify.”


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A user also said, “You’ll experience being the heartbreaker and the heartbroken. It’s unavoidable and a part of life.”

Added Stressors

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One Redditor said, “They can be draining and are often an added stressor to your life.”

Another commented, “All relationships are transactional to some degree.”

The Unknown

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Finally, a user added, “⁠You will never truly know the other person’s intentions/how they feel about you.”

Source: Reddit

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