A Reddit user (27F) is looking to buy a property with her fiance (27F). They both have a significant amount of money saved up between them, but her fiance’s bank account has recently been drained by her Father-In-Law (69M).
The FIL has said that he won’t return the money until a number of demands are met – including the couple signing a prenup before they get married. Should she urge her fiance to get the police involved or trust him to deal with it on his own?
A Father Who Won’t Relinquish Control
The original poster explained that the reason why her FIL had access to accounts in the first place is that a portion of her fiance’s savings had come from an inheritance from his grandfather. Before his grandfather passed away, he gave his son access to his accounts as he lost sight and needed support.
However, the FIL never relinquished control of the account despite acknowledging that the money was his son’s. As such, her fiance let him know that he was planning to use all of the money in the account, including the inheritance, to put money down on a house for himself and OP.
Now, if OP wasn’t putting money in herself, then you would be forgiven for perhaps sympathizing with the FIL for draining the account before he could purchase. If his son was about to commit thousands of pounds to a house for the pair of them while she was putting in nothing, perhaps he would be in his rights as a Father to advise him against that.
However, that isn’t the case. OP is putting in just as much money as her fiance, AND she is committing to paying more mortgage as she earns more than her partner. Therefore, his reasons for draining the account make little sense.
The FIL has said that he would give the money back if the couple agreed to a number of things, including a prenup and a LIEN. However, he has yet to do so despite their agreement to do both things.
With the FIL no longer responding to messages, OP wants to know how she should approach the situation with her fiance. She wants to get the police involved but is unsure as to how her fiance will react to that.
Advice From All Angles
In classic Reddit fashion, OP received a plethora of advice with few sitting on the fence. Not many people were confident that she would be able to get the money back, though, by contacting the police. One person said:
“This is exactly why you don’t have other people on your bank accounts, especially if they’re known manipulators. Forget trying to get him arrested because it’s a joint account, and as such, he has every right to access it. You might be better off going no contact, telling him you’ll never speak to him again, and he’ll never see his future grandchildren until he stops acting like a child himself.”
Other people were more optimistic about her chances of getting the money back by going through a lawyer rather than the police. One person said:
“I would talk to a lawyer about the wording of the trust. The father may have been on the account, but the will could have specified what the trust was to do with the funds after the grandfather passed. If he stayed on the account to make sure the funds were taken care of, but then took the money himself, then I believe your fiance might have a case.”
Should OP go straight to law enforcement to deal with the issue or would this create a permanent wedge between herself and her fiance’s family? What would you do in this situation?
We hope you enjoyed this Reddit thread. This article is inspired by the internet and does not necessarily reflect the views or opinions of Neon Moon.
This article was produced and syndicated by Neon Moon. This article is inspired by the internet and does not necessarily reflect the views or opinions of Neon Moon.
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