irritated couple fighting on the couch

Broken Trust: When Financial Hardship Tests the Limits of Love and Support

It’s said that the best things in life are free, compassion is free, sincerity is free, and love is free, but rent is not. Sadly, for many of us, having one or more jobs is necessary, especially when we have bills to pay and people to take care of. If you’re one of the lucky ones, you learned to save from an early age and hopefully built on that skill as you grew and got better-paying jobs. 

One user did just that. He believed that frugality and saving intelligently would get him where he wanted to be. He was also fortunate enough to experience some things money can’t buy, such as love, kindness, and compassion from a partner he said he adores. However, his love of money may be why he will be single tomorrow.

irritated couple looking away from each other at dinner
Image credits: Depositphotos Dragon Images

The Lay Off

The original poster (OP) begins by saying that he met his current girlfriend a little over a year ago, and he is absolutely head over heels, infatuated with her. He says that she is supportive, kind, and loving and has been through their entire relationship, and he’s tried to reciprocate that same support to her. OP’s dilemma is that recently she had a really large issue come up. He went on to say that she works in physical therapy, and her company laid her off, and she hasn’t been smart with her money as far as savings and investments are concerned. 

OP works in the business sector and has had his current job for a little over 7 years. He says it pays very well and that his field has been growing steadily for a while now. OP has also been very particular about his finances ever since he was a teenager and says he’s always made sure to save and invest intelligently. He said he has told his girlfriend to invest and save her money as he does, but she only puts away about 10% of her income.

The Move In

His girlfriend made a big investment in herself last year, moving into the city, so her financial situation hasn’t been great since they met as she’s only been in her current job and current city for about as long as they’ve been together. OP said she has a couple thousand saved up, and she had to move out of her apartment when she got laid off due to its rent of 1500$ a month, which he thinks is ridiculous. After she got laid off, she asked OP if she could move in with him for a bit to get back on her feet, and he begrudgingly obliged. 

His apartment isn’t massive, and now it’s way more expensive getting food for two every night. At this point, she has been out of work for a few weeks and still hasn’t found a new job. She’s gone on a few interviews, but he says they’ve fallen through. When OP asked her about getting another job, she says it’ll probably take a bit. 

The Argument 

OP feels like she’s taking advantage of him with the living space, and this was only compounded when she came and asked him to borrow $100 to pay off her credit card bills from earlier in the month. This irked OP, and he told her that he was done giving her money for free and that she needed to get a job soon because it was costing him money, allowing her to live with him and feed her. OP said she began crying and said that she couldn’t believe how he was acting after how long they’d been together. OP is wondering now, after what he said, if he was too harsh on her.

The Masses Weigh In

Redditors gave their opinion on this freeloading situation. 

One Redditor said, “Either you are not as clever with money as you think you are, or you are so rigid about money, that if your bank account dips a couple hundred bucks, you’re hyperventilating. YTA hard.

A second Redditor said, “We’re not talking about luxuries here. He seems very selfish and definitely YTA.”

A third Redditor said, “YTA. Listening to the way you describe the situation, it’s obvious you do not have a high opinion of her. She sounds like a nice girl who is down on her luck, and you’re kicking her when she’s down.”

Another user said, “You’re acting like she’s been unemployed for months with no job in sight. She’s clearly trying to get a job. You’re more concerned with your pockets than her.”

A Redditor had this to say, “Your financial intelligence is very high. Your emotional intelligence is very low. Your odds of being single by this time next year are nearly 100%.”

Another user had this to say, “Drawing the line at $100 dollars and complaining about being unemployed for 2 weeks is a jerk move.”

Source: Reddit

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