Frustrating Excuses: Readers Share The Most Ridiculous Excuses People Have Used To Break Up With Them 

Sometimes, people break up for reasons that may seem trivial or even ridiculous. Sometimes people are so wrapped up in themselves that they have a hard time seeing how absolutely insufferable they are. These insufferable people tend to be the worst at breaking up with others simply because they lack the tact and common sense that it takes to understand even basic emotions.

Thoughtless

A user posted, “He said, “You’re spending too much time with your dying father.” 

To which another Redditor replied, “Satan. You dated Satan. Bullet dodged.”

Just Like The Movies

A second user shared, “I love you so much and want to spend the rest of my life with you. We have to break up. If it’s really meant to be, then we will end up together again like they do in the movies.” Uhhh… what?!”

Listen To Your Parents

A third user added, “I was told, “My parents don’t want me to be in a relationship right now.” She started dating another guy about a month later.”

Getting Around

This user recalled, “She said because It’s senior year, she didn’t think she should date anyone. She said she needed to be alone and be independent for a little while.” Then she proceeds to have 3 different boyfriends that year.”

Back Stabber

A Redditor said, “She broke up with me because she didn’t want to be in a relationship right now.” She then asked my best mate out minutes later. He told her to jump off a bridge, legend.”

Flying Solo

A poster shared, “I had a guy tell me once that he was breaking up with me because “Tyler plane flies solo…” What is that? No, his last name was not plane.”

Let’s End It Now

This Redditor recalled, “He told me, “I love you, and I won’t be able to bare it if I lose you, so before that happens, let’s break up. We were 23 years old.

Too Busy

This commenter added, “I’m gonna be really busy with, like, track. I need to focus on it completely.” We were 16. It was on Valentine’s Day. And he quit track 2 weeks later.”

Wants To Be Single

A top-liked comment said, “I just need to be single right now.” What she really meant to say was, “I’m sleeping with your best friend.”

Not Enough

One user added, “After meeting his parents: My dad doesn’t approve because you’re not “white enough.” I’m not sure what exactly that means…I’m part Italian. I just figured I dodged a stupid people bullet on that one.”

Intimidated

A Redditor commented, “He stood me up for a movie and literally hid from me for three weeks. Later, he said that I was intimidating and he was afraid to disappoint me. Long story short: My ex was scared of me.”

Liars

This poster added, “I was stood up for the symphony- on Christmas. He told me his “grandpa fell out of a window, broke his arm, leg, and might get kicked out of his old folk’s home.”  It happened 2 minutes prior to him picking me up…He still insists that’s the truth- but ran into his father and asked how his Father-in-law was, and he didn’t have a clue as to what I was talking about. When I confronted said ex, he then confessed that he felt like he was not good enough and might disappoint me.”

All Aboard

A top-liked comment said, “I’m moving to Antarctica. Yes, I know I’m not a scientist. I’ll find work. Please don’t call me.” …I don’t know what I did, but I always tell myself I dodged a seat on the crazy train.”

Can’t Stop Myself

A commenter posted, “I’m reasonably sure he wasn’t cheating on me, but he said, “Some night, if a girl is nice to me at a bar, I might be unable to stop myself from having s****x with her, and I don’t want to cheat on you.” Getting about eight steps ahead of yourself there, buddy.”

Selective Amnesia

This poster shared, “She apparently overdosed on sleeping pills, went into a coma, and lost all memories of me (but absolutely nothing else) when she regained consciousness.”

Karma

One user commented, “A girl drove my car into a pond, totaled it, then broke up with me because “that’s your karma coming to bite you in the a****s, so you must have done something terrible.”

Same As You

This commenter mentioned, “Lying in bed together after six months. He said, “You know when you walk down the street, and you think a guy is really hot?” Me, “Um, I guess…” Him:  “Well, I do too.”

Poetry

One poster recalled, “She read a poem, then said she needed to find herself and that she didn’t want a relationship, and started dating a new guy about a week and a half later.”

A Distraction

A user posted, “You distract me from God.”  Three weeks later, he had a new girlfriend in tow.  His dad was a pastor, and he put on a good show but was really a terrible person when I got to know him. Dodged a cannonball there!”

Listens To Friends

This Redditor commented, “Because her friends thought she could do better. She couldn’t. She came crawling back, but I had moved on.”

A Change In Status

Finally, a user said, “Not so much a reason, but a method. I checked Facebook, and his relationship status went from “in a relationship” to “single.” I Had to ask if we were broken up, and he said “yes.” Thanks for letting me know.”

Source: Reddit

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