Have you ever experienced a date that had you wondering, ‘Is this a lost cause? How can I gracefully exit? When’s the earliest exit strategy?’
Here are some dating behaviors that women consider instant deal-breakers. These are the most upvoted no-gos from a popular online forum discussion.
Controlling and Toxic
“When they talk about how they treated their exes, children, and employees in a way that demonstrates they are controlling and toxic without realizing it,” said one. “Deadbeat dads with the harmful mentality that they’re the victim.”
A second added, “These people are the perfect combo of being toxic yet dumb enough to tell you they’re toxic. Or, similarly, talk about how every one of their exes was crazy. You start to find the common denominator, and it’s usually not the gal.”
Talking About Themselves Non-Stop
“When they only ever talk about themselves, and they don’t even realize it,” one stated. “I live in the USA. I have a European accent. The number of men who tell me how smexy/hot/beautiful/appealingly my accent is and spend the next 90 mins not letting me talk is comical!”
Thanks for letting me know. Although you adore hearing me speak, you do not want to listen to me talk early in the relationship. I hear you! Loud and clear, and it’s unattractive.”
Any Hint of Violence
“Any hint of violent tendencies or general anger management issues. Immediate block, not dealing with that. If I feel threatened, your feelings about being ghosted do not supersede mine of feeling safe,” someone replied.
Getting Too Intense Too Quickly
One woman shared, “When they get too intense, let’s say I’m talking with them for a week, and they are already telling me I’m the love of their life, the most beautiful women in the world, that they love me are huge red flags for me when I’m looking for green flags.”
“I feel like they like me for what they want me to be, not who I am. How can you know all this after knowing me for a week? So I get suspicious when they get too intense. Rom-coms make this seem so cute, but it’s so creepy.”
Not Maintaining Conversation
“Someone that doesn’t try to maintain a conversation with you. Like you’re talking to yourself. Guys, who cannot get beyond simple greetings and the question, ‘How was your day?’ Ask me questions about my life so I know you’re interested. I already answered my day in this ‘conversation’ three times!”
One woman shared, “Went out on the worst coffee date with a guy. He admitted that he placed a GPS tracker in his ex’s car to track her without her knowledge. Immediately no, I was paranoid for a week after that date.”
Not Respecting Boundaries
“Not respecting boundaries. Instant no,” shared one. “Guys will keep pushing it, and some girls will give in. I don’t understand that.”
Several women agreed before another added, “In even the slightest way. If he asks me if I want something to eat and I say no, it’s done if he tries to push past it. If he can’t respect small boundaries, he won’t respect big ones.
Sending Unsolicited Pictures
Sending unsolicited nakey pics is an unfortunate event that is widespread without prejudices or boundaries. Single and married women shared their horror stories about men sending them these pics. One woman suggested, “I find one on the internet that looks better, and I send them one back. Works like a charm.”
Smexual Innuendos or Jokes After Ten Minutes
“When you’ve known them for a whole ten minutes, and they’re already making inappropriate comments,” professed one. Many other women agreed with the sentiment. When a man asked, “Why?” Someone responded, “Because most women have been assaulted. So we are traumatized.”
Not Taking NO for an Answer
Finally, a woman shared, “I met a guy at a bar once. He seemed like a nice guy, and we exchanged numbers. The following week, he asked me out. I told him I couldn’t go out that night but was free tomorrow. He asked why and I told him I had a funeral tomorrow morning and didn’t feel like going out.”
“What time is the funeral?” he said. “I won’t stay too long, please. I really want to see you….”He wouldn’t take no for an answer, which is a HUGE red flag. I ghosted him after that.”
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