People often have various reasons for not dating anyone at the moment. These include prioritizing personal growth, recovering from past heartbreaks, focusing on career or academics, societal pressures, fear of vulnerability, busy schedules, contentment with friendships, financial concerns, emotional healing after a long-term relationship, or waiting for the right person. These factors contribute to their decision to stay single and concentrate on other aspects of life.
Worst Version of Me
One user said, “Dating me, especially right now, is one of the worse versions of me. I need to work on myself before I bring anyone into this mess.”
My Red Flags
A second user added, “The deal is, it’s a big red flag for me if you blow right past all mine. Believe me, when I say there are many.”
I’m My Dad’s Son
A third user shared, “I’m actually a pretty decent person until you date me. Then I become my dad, and no one wants to deal with that man.”
It’s Too Expensive
This user said, “When every profile says “travel, golf, EDM festivals,” I’m like…I can’t afford any of those things….oh and they say they want kids? Lmfao. Okay.”
A poster shared, “I matched with this woman on a dating app, who, from what I could tell, was a pretty successful businesswoman. We had been casually talking here and there for a few months. I commented on one of her posts about her love for tacos, and her response was, “So are you taking me out on a tacos date?” so I, of course, had to ask her out right there and then. I looked for the best-rated taco place in San Diego, and I knew she loved sunsets, so that’s what I proposed, tacos and a sunset date. She then asked me, “What else are we doing?” That’s when I realized this woman’s lifestyle is incompatible with mine, and I knew I’d go broke if I started dating her.”
For Love And Rent
One person said, “People in my city are getting into relationships to afford rent. So count me out on that.”
No New Friends
A user shared, “Because, after all, years and evidence, I am just not cut out for relationships deeper than acquaintance level.”
I Just Want a Roommate
A poster said, “My friends tell me I’m not looking for a boyfriend and want a roommate/partner. They’re right.”
A top-liked comment said, “Working on my mental health is more important to me right now. I can’t have any distractions!”
“I’m working on codependency issues that usually draw me to chaotic partners. So I’m taking a break from dating and attending CODA meetings.”
It’s Too Soon
A user recalled, “Because 3 years ago, I lost my soulmate, my boyfriend, to epilepsy. And it’s taken me a long time to get where I am. I’m barely ready to toe the waters in dating. I just don’t want someone to hurt me and add that on top of grief. I’ll continue to tread lightly, and if I meet someone, I do. If not, then ok too. I had a beautiful love. I have no complaints other than he had to go so soon.”
Meet My Ex
A poster commented, “If you had met my ex, you wouldn’t ask. I don’t even have the space to post all the things I went through! I need a break from it all!”
Zero Social Skills
This user posted, “Non-existent social skills, and I’m introverted AF. Also, I’m ugly and clearly have low self-esteem.”
“I could manage the social skills aspect if it weren’t for my anxiety. Get literally sick thinking about putting myself out there.”
Far Too Busy
This user stated, “I’m 34 and unemployed because I’m returning to school. I’m sure I’d have to beat the women back if I put myself out there.”
“A little bit introverted, average attractiveness and online dating is just sh****tty. But I don’t want to bother women in most “real-life” contexts, so I’m kinda stuck with the old sh****ttiness of having to do things in real life.”
Difficulty Meeting Others
One Poster shared, “I was not expecting it to be so difficult to meet people after college. I could literally talk to anyone! Now, everyone is way too busy and focused on so many different things.”
“Sh****ty people are good at finding good people because they’re predators. It’s so hard for a good person to get past the predators to find another good person.”
A user shared, “I’m enjoying the single life, but I wouldn’t mind dating—just a matter of finding someone with mutual interest. I’m open to it, just not looking for it.”
Takes More Than It Gives
Finally, a Redditor said, “A relationship just seems like it takes more than it gives. The best advice I ever heard applies to my situation; if you’re happy being single, stay single until you meet someone who makes you unhappy to be single.”
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