The Top 20 Qualities That Can Disrupt a Relationship From a Man’s Perspectiv

Men and women often have different perspectives when it comes to the qualities and behaviors they find attractive or unattractive in a potential partner. Some traits that women might not even be aware of can be significant turn-offs for men. These traits, as innocuous as they may seem, could be the determining factor between a blossoming relationship and one that ends before it even begins.

Here, we delve into the top 20 traits that men have identified as unattractive when exhibited by women, offering insights that could potentially help foster stronger, more satisfying relationships.


Self-Centered woman looking selfishly at her phone.
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A commentor shared, “A few weeks ago, I sat on a train, and this gorgeous woman sat down opposite of me. 2 stops later, a lot of people got on the train, and people had to stand at this point, she actively makes sure her purse is taking up the entire seat next to her. Instantly the ugliest woman on the entire train for me; have some respect.”

Accept Me

woman sitting on a couch looking nervous
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A second added, “A woman that has the, “I want you to change…but accept me for who I am” mentality.”


Man scratching head confused
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A third person said“Manipulative/testing behavior or playing games. Hurting others to make yourself feel better is wrong regardless of gender, anxieties, or past traumas.”

Placing Blame

Woman looking serious pointing at the screen as if she was asking us
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A user stated, “When she blames everyone for her own mistakes and can’t see that she is the issue. If there’s always an issue involving you, look at the common denominator.”


woman in a tiara
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A poster recalled, “Expressing how shallow you are. Someone I was attracted to said, “My future husband will have a lakehouse and a boat.” One of her friends responded, “Or maybe you can find the right person and then pursue that dream together!” And she was just like, “Nah.”

Bad Communication

man and woman yelling and pointing
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A top-liked comment said, “When she disagrees with you, she screams at you. God forbid, as adults, we handle disagreements through conversation instead of anger. No thanks.”

Overly Flirty

Woman and man leaning over a table at work getting close.
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This user added, “Flirting with every guy. If you’re trying to make me jealous/think that you could have any guy at any time, congrats, it worked, I’m out.”

Individual Focus

One commentor said, “This obviously goes for girls and guys, but when they focus primarily on themselves during a conversation. I was talking to a girl a few months ago, and it eventually just kinda hit me just how much she talked about herself or would steer conversations towards herself and her problems.”

Rude Comments

Angry woman pointing her finger
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One person commented, “Being rude or disrespectful without a reason. There’s no reason to behave like an a****ole to anyone for no reason.”

Being Mean

Couple looking angry and fighting verbally
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This user commented, “Don’t do mean sh****t. Mean people suck. My roommate invited a girl over, and she just barks, “MAKE ME A DRINK” at him.”

Treatment Of Others

man upset with hands on his head
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A top-liked comment said, “If she treats animals and waiters/service or retail staff badly. I’m an animal lover people that treat animals poorly will surely treat others the same way.”


man looking grossed out
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A user recalled, “I broke up with a girl recently, and one of the reasons was because she had a cat, and she smelled really bad, like her cat poop/pee. She would try to cover it up with this body mist stuff she had. She smelled like rubbing alcohol and made me cough a bunch because she would put so much on.”

Shared Responsibility

couple upset and looking away
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A commentor on the post mentioned, “Having a “You have to work for me” attitude. Like this relationship, we both need to put in the effort.”

Talking About Their Ex

Couple arguing on the couch
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This user said, “Constantly talking about an ex, even in a derogatory manner. Let it go. They’re your ex for a reason. I don’t care if they’re the greatest human you ever met, don’t compare me or trauma dump on me.”


Cheater man smiling at his computer next to an upset woman in bed.
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A poster commented, “Lying. I’ve met several women who lie for no reason. It could be dumb little trivial things all the way up to grand larceny. Yes, I said grand larceny.”

Being Flakey

girl making a cringy face
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A top-liked comment said, “Being Flakey. If we make plans and something comes up, that’s fine but don’t constantly make plans and then flake on me. It says more than I need to know about who you actually are.”

Negative Talk

Don’t Say “Calm Down!”: upset couple talking on a couch man looking away
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A user mentioned, “Talking negatively about everything and everyone. Uhhh, I can’t stand when women talk negatively about people, especially the judgey kind that just talk sh****t about anyone and everyone.”


woman crying with head down
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This person shared, “Being/feeling entitled. Entitlement reaches into many areas of a relationship, from considering opposite viewpoints, to s****x, to finances, to empathetic action, to working as a partner.”


woman hugging herself
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A commentor said, “Using “self-love” as an excuse to be narcissistic and crappy. Self-love means taking care of yourself. Not making excuses about why you’re a crappy person.”

Therapy Terms

Expecting Mindreaders man on phone woman arms crossed lookin away
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Finally, a post comment shared, “Throwing around too many TikTok therapy terms in general to justify sh****ty actions. For example, “trauma dump” I cannot stand that saying!”

Source: Reddit

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