unhappy couple sitting at a table with coffee

The Waiting Game: How Long Is Too Long to Wait for a Marriage Proposal?

Some people aren’t interested in getting married, while others have been thinking of it since they were dreaming as a small child. This one user (33F), has been wanting to get married for a long time now, but her boyfriend of six years hasn’t yet proposed yet. While six years may not seem a long time for some, for her, it feels like an eternity. Let’s hear the whole story before passing judgment. 

unhappy couple sitting apart on the couch
Image credits: Depositphotos Wavebreakmedia

Has the Perfect Moment Come and Gone?

The original poster (OP) explains that before she started dating her boyfriend six years ago, they were friends for ten years, so the amount of time they have been close is actually longer than initially meets the eye. 

The topic of marriage and proposals isn’t a taboo one in their relationship, and he even asked her to elope way back in 2019, which she said yes to. However, after some further consideration, he took it back, saying that he would like his family to be there on his wedding day. 

With that in mind, she was expecting a more formal proposal relatively soon after, but one hasn’t been forthcoming. OP says that she told him in February last year that she wanted to be engaged by the end of the year, but nothing came of it. 

They recently went away on a trip to Europe for their six-year anniversary, and she was convinced he was going to do it then, but again, nothing. She has always said to him that she doesn’t want to wait 6-8 years to get married, so it isn’t like she’s blindsiding him out of nowhere. 

She isn’t bothered about an expensive ring or an elaborate gesture; she just wants to get married to him. She wants to start a family with him, too but has always wanted to be married first before bringing children into the world. 

At this point, she doesn’t know how many times she can ask him before walking away from the relationship altogether. Taking to Reddit, she wanted to know what others would do in her position. 

Commitment issues at play?

OP had to face some hard truths from members of the Reddit community, who were quick to tell her that her partner sounded like he had commitment issues. One person said:

“Why would you commit to having a baby with a man who cannot commit to you? It seems like he’s stringing you along at this point if he really doesn’t have any intentions to it he keeps pushing back the date.”

Other people suggested that the right time had now been and gone, with one user saying:

“Even if he commits at this point, without some damn good reasoning, I wouldn’t trust him. Your best bet is to move on.”

There were plenty of others who thought that OP should cut her boyfriend out of her life and find someone who was prepared to commit. One user said:

“His words do not match his actions. His actions, or rather lack thereof, speak about what he really means and is about. Time to cut your losses and move on.”

Should OP just walk away from the relationship now or try and figure out the real reason why he seems so reluctant to propose? Let us know what you think in the comments. 

Source: Reddit

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