Wedding Dress Code Drama: She Wants Guests in Wedding Dresses for Her Wedding, But Her Sister Feels Left Out.
One soon-to-be bride thought she came up with an amazing idea that suited her personal style and would complete her vision of the perfect wedding until she talked to her youngest sister about it.
When it comes to planning a wedding, there is a lot that goes into it, from the guest list, wedding parties, color schemes, choosing the venue and food, all the way down to transportation.
This is a lot to take on, not even talking about the financial strain many feel when getting married.
An All-Wife Affair
The original poster (OP) begins by saying that she and her fiance are getting married in 2 years and that her personal style is very dark, meaning that she wears all black all the time, her hair is dark, and even her home is decorated in shades of black and grey. That said, OP’s idea is for her wedding parties to wear black, which includes her fiance, their son, nieces, and her in all black, and have the rest of the guests in white.
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OP’s sister is getting married this October, and she is the complete opposite of her in almost every way. Her sister will be in an all-white dress, and her wedding parties will be dressed in blue and blush colors.
OP and her sister were talking recently, and her sister mentioned that she loves her wedding dress and wishes she could wear it multiple times. OP told her to wear her wedding dress to her upcoming wedding, they both loved the idea, and OP says that if people still have their wedding dresses, they should wear them as well, provided they were white. Most of OP’s bridal party is also married, and she knows all of their dresses are white because she attended their weddings.
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No Wedding Dress
However, OP’s youngest sister hates the idea of guests wearing white and/or their wedding dresses. OP’s sister is the only one in her bridal party that isn’t married, so she would be the only one not wearing a wedding dress.
OP’s youngest sister has been engaged for 4 years, and she and her fiance are always breaking up, so she doesn’t have a dress. OP’s youngest sister is very upset over this and feels like she’s being excluded.
After OP’s youngest sister told her this, OP offered to help her buy a pretty white dress since her wedding is still two years away. OP’s youngest sister said no and said she would still feel excluded regardless of the dress.
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Upon hearing this, OP replied that she’s offering to help her and wants her to feel pretty at the wedding and that it’s not her fault that she and her loser boyfriend can’t stay together long enough to pick out a dress and actually get married.
OP says her sister hasn’t talked to her in over a week she feels bad about what she said, but she can’t help that her younger sister and boyfriend can’t get it together.
Reddit Weighs In
NTA. You didn’t say, “you have to wear a wedding dress,” you said, “wear a white dress” she’s definitely projecting her unhappiness about her long engagement
But also. YTA for calling her and her boyfriend losers.
NTA. It’s not like you came up with the idea solely to exclude your sister, the only reason she’s upset is because her not being married is a sore spot for her. And honestly, on-again-off-again relationships never work out, if she wants to get married she’d probably have a better chance if she dumps him and finds someone else.
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“It’s not just the men who might have nothing to wear. What about the unmarried women, those who can’t fit into their wedding dress, those who don’t have it anymore, those who don’t have white dresses, those who simply don’t want to wear their wedding dress to a random event to assist the OP’s gimmick, those who don’t want to spend an evening in a probably incredibly uncomfortable dress? The sister’s meltdown is obviously about her own issues, but this is a YTA dress code.”
“Your title is not addressing the problem. It sounds like your sister doesn’t have a problem with wearing white, her problem is that everyone will be wearing a wedding dress except her and she will feel left out.”
“No, you aren’t responsible for her relationship and engagement being rocky, but she is your sister and I can really see how immensely sh***y that situation would be for her.”
“She is your sister and is in your bridal party, so I assume you like her. I think you two should have a nice long heart to heart where you both have an opportunity to share your feelings and maybe come up with a solution together. However, my honest judgment is YTA because it sounds like you went nuclear right away, even though it’s clear your sister is struggling. What you said to her was cruel and humiliating.”
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“NTA and I don’t think what you said makes you an AH either. Sounds like she needs some perspective for her own relationship rather than project her problems on other people trying to ruin their happiness.”
“YTA I’m so tired of people getting married and demanding a certain color dress code. What if Someone looks bad in white or hates the color? And many women hate wearing white when they have their period. Weddings cost a lot to attend and now you want people to buy and wear something they hate and/or are uncomfortable in? And yes, They have the choice to not attend, but then don’t get pi***d off if they choose not to.” EDIT: If that is only the dress code for the bridal party, that makes sense, but if you want all guests in white too, then YTA.
Redditors decided that the OP was not in the wrong with her wedding dress decision. What is your opinion? Should she change her wedding vision just because of her little sister’s feelings?
This article is inspired by the internet and does not necessarily reflect the views or opinions of Neon Moon.
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