When you’ve been with someone for a long time, you naturally start to understand their habits and routines. When your significant other then starts breaking this routine, it is very noticeable, and it can cause you to start panicking about worst-case scenarios.
Why are they going out of their way to do something they’ve never done before? Are they cheating on me?
This Reddit user (24M) has started to notice a worrying pattern in his wife’s (23F) late-night behavior. Let’s find out why he’s beginning to panic…
The original poster (OP) explains that he got married to his wife when he was only 20, and the pair of them are high school sweethearts. The relationship has always been plain sailing, and whenever they have disagreements, they usually smooth things out quickly.
Neither of them are massively sociable, and they typically prefer to spend their spare time with each other at home rather than out with friends. Recently, however, OP’s wife has broken this habit and has started to go out more frequently with her friends.
He is happy that she’s become more outgoing, but he feels her partying might be excessive. He says it now at the point where she goes out every other night and sometimes doesn’t return home until the following morning.
OP says that he can’t help but think the worst, and he has broached the topic with her. She has told him that she wants to enjoy her twenties, and while OP doesn’t want to be controlling, he isn’t comfortable with her being out all night multiple times a week.
What’s more, when she does come back home, she is “standoffish” with OP and acts like she doesn’t want to talk about her night out. OP wants to know how he can go about asking her to reign it in without coming across as controlling. He says that going out with her isn’t an option as that isn’t his scene.
A Difficult Situation Acknowledged
While almost everyone in the comments acknowledged that OP was in a tricky situation, everyone had differing views on just how deep the problem was.
One person believed that his wife’s behavior stemmed from their marriage at a young age. They said: “This is why I think you shouldn’t marry young. She, likely with the push of her friends, probably feels she needs to have “college experiences” like going out and staying out. She probably realizes that the rest of her life is with someone, so she wants to have the majority of the fun that she would’ve had if she hadn’t married at 19.”
Other people believed that the end of the relationship could be on the horizon, with one person saying that she was now living with her mom after enduring a similar situation with her husband. While another person said: “Unfortunately, this will be the end of OP’s relationship. Even if not cheating, making this a habit is not reasonable when married.”
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