When the idealized view of your partner fades away and you begin to realize that they no longer care about you, it can be difficult yet crucial to acknowledge the harsh reality. While facing the truth may be painful, it raises an important question: Do you truly want to remain in a relationship with someone who doesn’t prioritize your well-being? Let’s explore some signs that can help you identify if this is indeed the case.
Use Of Dating Apps
One user said, “When the “your match is about to expire” notification from a dating app popped up while he was showing me Tik-Toks.”
Lack Of Empathy
This user shared, “I was physically assaulted at work. When I told him about it I expected him to be horrified, protective, or at least not happy about it. Instead, he looked bored. He implied that I get a bit mouthy so maybe I ticked off the wrong guy.”
Inability To Comfort
One shared, “I had to drive a couple of hours to say goodbye to my dying grandpa in the hospital. On my way back home, I stopped for dinner. My then boyfriend’s first reaction when he saw me—rather than comforting me because I’d just visited my grandpa for the last time—was to get angry that I didn’t get him food.”
Dismissing Their Outlets
A user said, “When I explained that I’d been feeling depressed because playing music is my outlet and I’d been really missing it. I bought a keyboard for the extra bedroom which he didn’t notice for 2+ months. When he did notice he told me to get rid of it because he doesn’t want “extra junk” in his house. He told me if the keyboard didn’t go, I had to. So I took the keyboard and left.”
Always Being Strong
This user shared, “He’d cry to me about emotional issues sometimes, and I always held him and talked him through it. Eventually, I needed the same support, but instead, he got mad and started yelling, blaming me, and telling me, “One of us has to be the strong one; I can’t have a partner who falls apart like this. I need someone strong.”
“When he accused me of being manipulative because I was crying. Why was I crying? Because I had literally just received the news that my closest friend had committed suicide.”
One user shared this story, “We were out in town, and he wanted to grab some street food. I didn’t have money on me, so I got nothing. He didn’t offer. I sat next to him, watching him eat. It was small, and yes, I could’ve said something, but it was just one of many occasions that made me understand that he doesn’t care about me the way I care about him. Even after two years!”
“When I fell down the stairs at my boyfriend’s house, and I was screaming in pain because I broke my ankle, he got mad at me because he had to drive me to the hospital. He later shared that he got angry because he wanted to play a video game.”
Not Respecting Boundaries
A top-liked comment said, “He’s now my ex-husband. One night I begged him not to tell me what happened at the strip club because I knew I’d use the knowledge to torture myself. The first thing he did when he got home was brag about the lap dances he got and how hot those women were compared to me to upset me because he wanted attention. It didn’t work, and I ignored him, so he punched my chair. We had problems before that, but that night killed any respect I had left. Things deteriorated quickly afterward.”
A user also shared, “I confronted him and discovered I was just a side piece. I cried for days, mostly because I couldn’t believe I was that stupid.”
A reader shared, “When I realized that I always needed to adjust to his schedule, and the relationship immediately fell apart when I stopped putting in the effort.”
A user shared, “When my ex proposed to me and then three weeks later started cheating on me with one of his employees that was underage.”
This user had this to share, “While I was in my third trimester of pregnancy, we got into an argument, and I started feeling pain in my abdomen, I collapsed, and he just stood there, laughed, and said it serves me right for being argumentative.”
A poster said, “I’d come down with the horrible flu. He convinced me to come over to his place “Let me take care of you, you shouldn’t be suffering alone”, he said. I wanted to stay in my own bed and ride it out, but he kept at it. I thought he was just trying to be a caring boyfriend. The entire time I was there, he pestered me to be intimate.”
This user shared, “The final realization was when I tried talking to him about the complicated relationship I have with my father. He became angry with me for not understanding what fathers go through and a general explanation of why life sucks for men. Like bro. Are you gaslighting me about my own relationship with my dad? That was when the bulb went on that he didn’t care enough to understand my experiences. Broke up with him soon after.”
Lack Of Validation
A top liked comment said, “When he had to pick me up after I was mugged, he drove me straight to a bar. I started crying when I realized we weren’t going home, and he argued with me why we should go out until he took me home just to ignore and pout.”
A user had this to say, “When he didn’t want to tell one of his (unbeknownst to me, MANY) girls on the side that it was over because (and I quote) he “didn’t want to hurt her feelings!” And then again, when I was only hours from having heart surgery and he chose that moment to tell me he didn’t love me anymore.”
Making Time For Others
This person shared, “When I had to have an emergency procedure and instead of him driving me, I had to take the train because it was too early for him to bring me. I had no drivers license. A week later he helped his family at 7AM to move. Priority noted.
Out Of Your League
Finally, a reader shared, “When my fiancé told me that I was just a convenient babysitter with benefits after I discovered her cheating. She went on and on about how she was so out of my league that I should have known, and it was my fault for being so stupid. I was just a roof over her head and took care of her kids while she went out to hook up with guys.”
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